up, down, left, right.

It was a sense of control that probably shouldn't be given to me. I would never trust someone like me with any responsibility.

"you are strong. I can't say much else about you."
No. I'm a liar, and that's all I'll ever be. I've dug so far down, there's no way out anymore. Except for that one, but I couldn't do it. I'd fall so far. Farther than I've ever been. And to be honest, I don't know what would pull me out anymore.

"And I love that about you."
What do I say to you now? I haven't felt that way in ages. And now, you do? I don't know if I can retrieve the feelings from a year ago. I don't know if I want to.

But then, then there's you. The answer to my possible prayers. The ones I pray for, but don't expect to recieve. Does that make any sense? You're just, everything. There's no other way to describe you, really.

He's here. He sits on my couch like its his. Goes through the fridge like its his food. Talks to me like I should respect him. And I don't. I hope I never do. He tries to start conversation, but doesn't listen. He started to date my mom before they were divorced. And he expects me to respect him. I promise, that is the one thing I will never do.