Usually I start these with a lot of random garbage that no one really wants to read. So, I'm just gonna skip all of that.

TOP TEN MOST INFLUENTIAL PEOPLE THIS YEAR:
1. Jesus. Predictable? Probably, but I learn more and more from Him every day.
2. Melody. She's my best friend, hands down, no matter what. I don't care if we're living in the same house or living 5845934953 miles away. She's my best friend, and nothing changes that.
3. Kenny. Hey there mister, you're awfully high up on my list once again... I love him... Still...
4. Corey! He's great. He makes me laugh, he makes me think, he makes me smile, and sometimes he makes me frown. But basically, I adore him XD
5. Josh. I met him this year, and he quickly became pretty close to me.
6. Alex. He always seems to pop up when I need him.
7. Lauren. The best.
8. JULIE! I love her, she is so stinking funny and she's just great.
9. Cam. Sometimes I think our friendship causes more drama than it's worth. But I love him, and we seem to get through it.
10. Mrs. Fulford. She always listens to me. Even when I have nothing to say.

TOP TEN BEST FRIENDS THIS YEAR:
1. Kenny.
2. Lauren.
3. Melly.
4. Julie.
5. Corey.
6. Josh.
7. Nastassja XD
8. Timmy!
9. Bri.
10. Cam.

TOP TEN MOST LISTENED TO SONGS:
1. ugh... teenage dream... I was obsessed for like two weeks o.O
2. Forget you by Cee Lo Green
3. Beautiful things by Gungor
4. Saeglopur by Sigur Ros
5. Anything by Minus the Bear
6. This is the thing by Fink
7. Collide by Howie Day
8. The song by The boy ;)
9. Little Lion Man by Mumford & Sons
10. Wrapped in Your Arms by Fireflight

GOALS FOR THIS SUMMER:
1.Reckless camp <3
2. Buffalo?
3. Maine with Julie!
4. Get a tan... for real.
5. Actually accomplish the things on this list since I only did one from last year...
6. Fix things.
7. Get a job
8. Plan a get together with my whole class.
9. I wanna learn how to swim without holding my nose...bahahha.
10. uphold the welling.

Jeez how much things change in a year. I can't even handle it. New school, new friends, old school, old friends, living with a different parent. It didn't even seem that different going in...

Lisa Mitchell - Incomplete Lullaby

Mere words cannot express...


I don't want you to know that I miss you, but it's so hard to stop myself from shouting it at you. To stop myself from jumping around, with flailing arms, screaming "please just come back!". To stop myself from looking into your eyes, and gently whispering "I miss you." To stop myself from absently stating it in the middle of conversation. It's so hard to stop myself from feeling it.

Oh, won't you dance with me once more?

Bring it back to that day in my study. We'll dance to Alexi Murdoch, and pretend the past five months didn't exist.

Forget that our lips have met any one elses besides each others. We'll dance like we'll be together forever, and always have been. I'll erase the cruel words from my memory, and remove the malice from my heart. I'll burn the images embedded in my brain of you and her.

I'll keep that shoe box, and your guitar pick in my pocket. We'll smile at each other again in passing. We'll work our way up.

But I just have one request, won't you dance with me once more?

Ellipses and question marks have become the punctuation of our conversations, when it used to be commas and exclamation points.

Choices.

If I could go back through all of the fights, all of the walks to the park, and the day at the aquarium. Back before our first kiss, and our first hug, the first hello. Before I decided you were the funniest person I had ever met, and before you became the only person I’d willingly cry in front of. Back to before we could finish each others sentences and we could press each others buttons because we knew exactly where they were. Before the welling of love, and before the heartbreak and pain. Back when we were still learning and living, before we shared our hopes and dreams, our secrets and fears. Before you met my family, and before we fell in love, I can’t decide if I still would have told you the words that changed everything: “I like you too”

caught up in just this way I know that you can be more than this

I had forgotten how nice it is to just sit and pray for an extended period of time.
I missed it so incredibly. I don't even want to stop.
As I sit here writing this, I'm thinking about how I wish I was still spending time with God.
This is a weird feeling, that I am really enjoying.
It was so nice to just sit in my closet talking about everything that's happened in the past few months. About how hard headed I am. How it takes so many tries before God is able to reach me.
I talked about every sin recently. Every mess up, every mistake. I talked about how stupid I feel for chasing after something I thought would make me happy, that distracted me from God, and in the end really only caused pain.

Usually, I probably would have cried over him.
Today, I cried over my broken relationship with God.
It wasn't about anything but that.
It was all about how much I missed my God, and how I didn't understand why I've wasted so much time on so many things that will never be as fulfilling as God, especially when I know that to be true.

This is a fantastic feeling.

mm, Kate Nash. She's just fantastic.