Forever just won't do.

This is a new concept entirely.
Accepting my Mom's relationship?
I was on the verge of doing so... Until they started sleeping in the same room, until they took a shower together. What happened to teaching me about no sex before marriage? Shouldn't that apply to you as well? Just because you've been married twice, doesn't mean you get to have sex with whomever you please now. God intends for us to have sex with the person we are married to. Not someone who the "relationship isn't even serious" with.
I am disgusted. I am disappointed. And I have lost the remaining bit of respect I still had for you.



"I'm watching everyone I looked up to break and bending."

It's so hard to try to do the right thing, when all the people who used to encourage you, are the ones who are falling apart. But the worst part is, they don't care. Or even realize how much they affect everyone with their choices.

Drinking, smoking, swearing, sex, I'm surrounded by it all on a daily basis.
And it wasn't so hard, when I had friends who were against it, too.
But they've all fallen into society's expectations.

Do hard things? Amazing book.
Why are people's expectations of teenagers so low? Maybe if we raised our expectations, more teenagers would succeed.



Anyways... Three hour phone conversations are fun.
Especially when they're with someone who doesn't judge you, they just listen, and they understand. With someone who may not have gone through the same things, but as had to deal with the same emotions. With someone who is absolutely amazing, and understanding. With someone who you love and who you never want to end the conversation with. You wish you could stay awake forever just to talk about nothing.

I admitted things I've never told anyone about.
My fears.
My dreams.
My failures.
And he listened, and he made me feel better, without even trying.

We told stories. Some make believe, and some true.
But we just listened to each other.

People tend to avoid their fears.
Right?
We do whatever we can to run away or ignore them.
Why don't we confront them?

My biggest fear is failure... and sponges, but that's another story.
Failing at life, I'm terrified.
They say the things we fear, are just the things we think will happen, but we don't do anything to prevent. That sometimes they are things we think we can't change. So we don't bother trying.


From all the things we talked about last night, I could go on forever about them all.
To describe every detail, and remember every moment.
But instead, I'll stop here.


New year's resolutions? I'll do them when I have my computer back.