No, no, I'm not okay.

I thought maybe when you said we wouldn't go out again, I'd get over you.
I was terribly mistaken.
I can't do this.
It's safe to say I still really like you.
And it's getting kind of frustrating, all these guys like me, but none of them are you.
I wouldn't say yes, unless they were you.
I'm pretty much completely pathetic.
You have total control over me.
You're the one person who would never take advantage of that, though.
I just don't really know what to do.
The fact that I still can't believe I got someone as amazing as you.
I'm just... in pain.
I need to call you. But I'm so sick of breaking down on the phone with you.
I just, don't know anymore.
I just wanna move on. But I don't know how.
How do you give up the one person you know is supposed to be in your life?
When someone has an answer to this for me, I'll be amazed.

my stomach hurts.
And so does my head.
I wish you'd call, so I don't have to.

And no, it's not for the better.
Not in the least.
I was just becoming happy.
And then everything fell apart again.
I wish you could fix it again.
But I know you can't, nor do you want to.

I hate myself so much right now.

I need to go throw up for a while.